ww2 or something like it

My prof most recently tried to explain the idea of the "arleady/not yet" time period, between the first coming of christ and the second. She did this by giving the worst analogy i have ever heard.

"Think of  ww2, the fight between the allies and the Axis of Evil. so christ's death is kinda like D-Day, the war is won and over, hitler's really steaming..., and now there are only a few loose ends to tie up. so the Axis wins! Jesus has risen! and now there is just the waiting period till he comes back again and the allies are finally forced to lay down the rest of their arms."

I don't even know where to start. D-day could be considered the end of the war, if you consider EUROPE as a loose end. The Axis of Evil did not participate in this war. Also it was the Allies that were the good guys (perspective). But soo close!

its a good thing that you don't have to know anything about history to teach the new testament!

This is why i drink

I'm back in college now and i'm running into some issues. basically i love to learn, but hate who i'm learning from and with. All my professors, save one, are terrible. if you told me that i would only like one class out of "old testament, new testament, cultural anthropology, genetics and society, and christian thought" never in a million years would i guess that it would be an Old testament class 45 mins away at 9 am. but the class is awesome. In new testament we sing hymns (literally, for like the first 10 min of every class) and wrong answers are accepted if their ignorance is wrapped in faith. actually answer "Rome had like alot of kings and not all of them where nice and everyone saw that they needed a better king, one who was sinless and pure, and thats why they loved jesus and why people followed him in rome" Honey, the only people following him in rome had nails and hammers. and they didn't have kings, they were emperors. and yet, AND YET! the prof said "absolutley" and people started writing it in their notes!!!

My cultural anthropology professor has no concept of culture or anthropology! he's horrible and continually calls other people groups, lost peoples, and insists the only reason to learn about another culture is to find how best to bring them the good news and convince them to live as god intended. also he blames liberals for inventing evolution.

My christian thought professor is so smart! he can even make up statistics! like how 53 million abortions happen in the united states every year!

fun fact! Scandinavia is comprised of three main countries. can you guess them. if you guessed Sweden, Denmark and Norwegia you're also wrong. because thats what one gal answered in my class, who was then corrected by the gal next to her that the countries called Norwegian. Closer, but you're still an idiot.

direct quote from a prof "jesus dieded for our sins." SERIOUSLY? a guy so nice he dieded twice.
we have a forum online that we must participate in and its terrible. its suppose to be about theology but instead its about why gays are evil, how america no longer lives in a black and white moral world and how everything would be better if we just reverted to the 1950's and lived as our founding fathers intended.

Olivet may have been legalistic and horrible. but they at least could spell legalistic.

Bad Words

On a scale of One to Fucked, I'm about..... Here
[1--------------------------Fucked]              X  
I like school, I hate schools. they get in the way of learning. lets take a colourful tour of my track record.

I graduated highschool a semester early because I didn't really enjoy it anymore. I spent that last semester getting my Gen Eds out of the way like a good boy should. Speech, Soc., Psych. all done. We add that to the AP classes of US History and World History and i'm well on my way to being a semester ahead before summer even hits.

I went to Olivet and then just as suddenly left. Having only spent one year there I could already tell that it was not the school for me. [also seeing as their degrees appear to be near worthless (sorry friends) it was probably the wise choice]. However I can't help but think that if I had given them a bit of my soul, 45 thousand dollars and 3 years of my life, I might be working in a hospital by now.... hmmm.

Sometime later I applied to Northern Illinois University, enrolling in their EMT-Paramedic program. I say this because it was offered on the website and because the adviser recommended it! I said great! signed up for housing with my brother Joe and went to the orientation/ registration day. It was there that I found out there was no such program. It was a different program which had been mislabeled, and was merely something that might help someone who is trying to become an EMT-Paramedic. (note: a four year bachelors program to prepare you for a two year associates program not offered at their school.) I explained my situation to the college and was given my housing deposit back and a shrug of the shoulders.

I then went back to my community college (Harper) and became certified as an EMT, I also got a ton of nursing prereqs out of the way. and received my AA.

I found a Paramedic program! it was in Flagstaff, Arizona. I contacted the adviser, went over my credits and sent transcripts! I even talked to the Director of the program and was signed up. Barely a month before moving out there to attend school I got a call. Requirements had been reworded. no longer did you need to be an EMT for a year before being enrolled. you needed to work as an EMT for a year before being enrolled. So After I was ACCEPTED, I was told I no longer qualified for the program and was dropped. I was not given my 50 dollar registration fee back.

I met with an advisor today. The nursing program has a rule that any math or science classes (regardless of grade recieved) must be completed within 3 years of the program start date. the program application date is 9 months before the start date and all prereqs must be completed before applying. so that means... well here,  it's more impressive when you do the math.  I have 73 credit hours completed. can you guess how many will transfer into this program? 0

so thats 5 institutions that I have been admitted to. 3 of them fucked me and 1 I couldn't stand.

Par for the course i guess.

Now it wouldn't be the absolute worst thing in the world if it weren't for a stupid rule. see, I could handle a 24 credit course load of courses I've already received A's in. Heck, I wouldn't even have to go to class, I could just email in all my assignments and never have to study. except for a stupid rule. You have to take these classes in a specific order. which mean, i would have to go to classes I've already taken, for the next year and a half. then wait 9 months, then enter the nursing program and spend 2.5 years there. so lets do some math again, i'm 23, i would be 24 by the time i would start the first classes. so 1.5+.75+2.5= roughly 5 years! i would be 29! that's after me already taking 2.5 years worth of college. But lots of people go to school for 7 years, THEY'RE CALLED DOCTORS! and they have letters after their name! they don't have a shitty associates degree!

Mind Games

I don't like mind games, thats why I left high school. But now I am selling our car and the mind games are coming back like a tsunami of passive aggressive doucheiness. I'm not talking about the lowballer that calls up and offers you 1500 less than your asking price, as his "final offer" (even when he's never even seen the car). While certainly douchey, its hardly a mind game. And surprisingly I'm not talking about the guy who drives with you 40 min away to his friends shop and then only talks in Bulgarian for 20 min. While still douchey, it's really more inconsiderate than anything. I'm referring to the people who bring along a "bad cop". the setup goes like this, I go to look at a car that I reallllllly want. (for your reading pleasure I've put all sarcasm in italics). And I would LOVE to buy it, but I really want my Dad (substitute anyone older or more mechanic looking) to check it out first. Oh whats this!? It looks like the brakes need to be replaced. (While I was told about this before I drove all the way out to see it, I act surprised.) Darn... I mean its a great car, and I'd buy it in a second, it just seems kinda pricey... well let's think about it on our 30 min test drive where I will pretend that I'm preparing for my next Formula One race. Now we'll switch and have my dad drive it, where he will brake check on the interstate at any moment with no fucking warning, and then bitch about the brakes some more. finally, back at the owners driveway, I'll rock back and forth and say things like, "well its not really sporty, I mean, for a late 90's sedan... and it's reallly going to need those brakes replaced (*side note, how can something that either needs to be replaced or doesn't, REALLLY need to be replaced. as if extra effort come into account?) and it doesn't fly, which is kind of a put off.... what would you take for it? I mean, lowest price?

It is times like these that I am thankful that I am not on a time constraint. that I'm not desperate for any amount of cash this person will give me.

So I've decided not to be pushed around, which might make it a longer wait to sell, but will certainly make me happier. At the moment I am waiting for a call from a guy who is an hour late to come see the car and has not called to apologize or reschedule. I do not have his number, because he called from a restricted line, and he does not have my address, because I choose to meet at the local QFC. So If he does call me later today, I'm just going to tell him tough luck. These are the dangers of selling your car on Craigslist. But there aren't a whole lot of options otherwise.

also someone offered to pay in foodstamps...

Rage infested Monkeys

So I've been thinking about future. and I know I've said a few times that a zombie apocalypse would solve all my problems. But I am here to say it again! I am so sick of money, and titles, and pretense. I don't understand the difference between being an EMT and working as an EMT for a year, not when experience isn't a factor!  sometimes if feel like covering myself in A-1 climbing the roof and screaming "this world needs to burn" till I can't see colors anymore. I long for simplicity. I've been building and fixing and crafting so many things lately, and I love it. All I want to do anymore is build houses and heal people. I guess I just don't understand where the disconnect is.

dodging bullets

as many of you know, stac and i were trying desperately to get the nuclear power outage jobs. in fact you could say we were kind of counting on them. but we didn't get them, and all that money went to someone else. People kept saying "god has better things in store for you" which we believed. but had a hard time buying that those "better things" would pay more. well we found out the other day that those jobs got cut short. and that the amount of money we would have made was substantially less than we thought. and the jobs we have now are awesome! and we love seattle and we are very happy. it was a blessing that we didn't get those jobs.

Sound, Sound, and Sound.

We have arrived in Seattle! It was a very long trip with lots of scary sections (mountain passes, rough roads, blinding fog, people from Idaho) but we finally arrived home safe and sound around 2:30 or so on sunday. The U-Haul is finally unpacked and all the boxes are scattered throughout the house. Stacey's training has already begun and I'm still trying to get us unpacked. My portabe hard drive will all my music is somewhere packed away so I'm left with whatever we have on the computer, mostly odd stuff like The Faint and then other crap like Ke$ha. ugh. I'm sure real soon Courtney and I will have a music swap, so my suffering won't be prolonged for too long I hope. We're not completely in the city but we are still in more of an urban area than I'm used to living in. just a few blocks down is the highway and you can see pugent sound from there. I start training on saturday for the janitor/ occasional coffee shop position. Both of which I will love. It sounds like Tony and Courtney will be moving in early, maybe as soon as early april! Very excited to spend more time with those two.
I remember growing up and telling my parents I wanted to have dreadlocks, tattoo's, piercings. They always responded with something along the lines of, "how are you going to get a good/real job with those?"
Welcome to Seattle.

Point of No Return (not just another good Kansas song)

As many of you know, we are leaving this morning for Seattle. It's going to be 3-4 long days in the car and truck, with the not-so-happy cats. But what I'd like to talk to you about today is limits. anyone who has ever told you that there are no limits, or that the sky is the limit, has lied to you. Or has clearly not seen Apollo 13, excellent movie, Ron Howard, good stuff. But back to our discussion, limits are important to know. Our limit is 2000 lbs. that is how much weight our hitch can tow. now the trailer we have is around 850 lbs. I'll do the math for you. The amount we can tow < The weight of all our possessions. So we've packed it as full as we can and left a few things behind. (scooter, cat tree, booze, gardening equipment, huge body pillows, etc.) Now I've stood back and looked at the marvelous packing job I've done, and thought, that looks like 1150 lbs of stuff... right? This is where the point of no return comes into play. I have to assume that my possessions are less than 1150 lbs. otherwise I'm risking the hitch falling off. HOWEVER. If I AM over 1150 lbs., are these big pillows really going to make that much of a difference? You get to the point where its all or nothing. if I leave anything here its of no use to me. and If I bring it with and it gets destroyed, its still of no use to me, but atleast then it's insured.

I'll blog again from Seattle to let you all know we made it safe. Or if I don't, you'll all recieve little white cards in the mail with solemn print inviting you to a slightly different occasion. in any case. so long till then. :-)

The Renaissance Man

Since being released early for bad behaviour, I've had more time on my hands. I've used this time wisely and fully, I've reached level 28 on Nazi Zombies and have watched full seasons of trashy TV programing. "With Vampire Bill missing and her Boss/Ex-Boyfriend shapeshifter Sam once again vying for her attention, what will Sookie Stackhouse decide and will she ever be safe in her humble town in the bayou?" *clicks add full series to instant queued*

But I've also spent alot of time reading and doing crafts! Something I really enjoy but never seem to have enough time for. I've even considering an etsy shop! but we'll see what the future has instore when it gets here. So far I've started crocheting again, I've also painted my dirty black chuck taylors bright kelly green for St. Patrick's. I've started making chainmaille which is so much fun and super easy but a real pain in the ass even still. I've been taking vintage ties from the thrift store and making them into trendy belts. I've also been toying with the idea of making shirts again. But in any case here are some of the success stories, and we just won't mention the number of chainmaille tragedies it took to get to this point.

Double Coda Marriage Weave

The Chain Maille Neck Tie

For looking your best, even in battle.

The Viking Beard Hat.

Because scarves are for little girls.

I would like to thank the Department of Unemployment of the great state of Wisconsin for all its support. Without you, none of this could have ever happened.

Emulation

I remember when Eminem first got popular. (now I realize this is a dangerous way to start off a post. you're prolly thinking "oh man, here we go, its either going to be a 'remember those days' post, or this entire blog is going the way of a of a latenight fox sitcom, a slow painful death that upset all 6 of its followers. but stick with me.) I remember right after he got popular everyone started buzzing their hair and bleaching it. suddenly it was ok for skinny white kids to dress like gangsters. when we see something, whether it be a style, a personality trait, or a way of speech that we find interesting or attractive we emulate it. its like that screeching weasels song. "everywhere i go, i find more pieces of myself." we see something, we decide that we want to make that apart of ourselves and we do, whether consciously or subconsciously.

there is a problem with this though. you can't always adopt certain traits out of the blue. allow me to give you and example. I recently found out I was a hipster. (I know, and thank you for your prayers.) I found this out by accident. I googled it and searched the old urban dictionary and sure enough, the definition practically described me. Not all of it in a positive light I might add. so lately I've been dressing more like a hipster, and people have noticed. People think its lame that I find out I have some characteristics in common and suddenly go out and buy a closet full of flannel and start growing a beard. But here's the fun part. I was already growing a beard, and I've had a closet full of flannel since I was 12! I just didn't know I could wear it. lol. 

or an even better example is Stacey, Stacey now wears skinny jeans, but so does everyone, so its not a huge noticeable change. there is a line though. lately we've been watching Tru Blood. And both Stac and I think the whole, southern gentleman and southern style is kinda cool. but you can't just start wearing cowboy boot and talking in a southern accent out of the blue. that'd be crazy. (ps. i'm totally getting cowboy boots cause hipsters wear them, and I've always wanted a pair so I can keep a straight razor in them like a Quinton Terantino character.) so there is always going to be limits. but I personally love the culture mashing. so if you see me walking up in cowboy boots, skinny jeans, flannel, and some avaitors, try to cut a brother some slack. cause it can get rough in these parts

downtime

Stacey and I were asked to watch the dogs and the house while my parents are on their cruise. we jumped at the chance. while mom and dad go someplace warm so do we! chicago is almost 9 whole degrees warmer than two rivers! woot! bring on the sunshine. so while we're down here, we need stuff to do. you can only apply for jobs and school so much. and only watch netflix so much. (ps. totally had netflix the whole time I was at fam vid. suck it.) so stacey asked me, "what did you guys do for fun around here." and answer is simple, nothing. Joe, my best man, told her we watched movies, played halo, ping pong hacky sack and talked. see the thing I had forgotten was that we were in school at the time. we only had weekends to try and squeeze in as much fun as possible and even then we had homework. and in the summer I worked jobs in other states. I've kinda come to the conclusion that no matter where you live. there is nothing to do, atleast not without spending a ton of money. at some point hiking mountains will lose its luster, halo will pwn out, and pingpong elbow will sideline even the most seasoned athlete.

Pictured: Most Seasoned Athlete

So for the time being it looks like we'll be going to a couple bars with friends and maybe catching a movie at the cheap theatre not far from the house. so glad we've gotten out of that old wisconsin routine...=]

Hideous orange chair for sale

I was finally fired from that awful job and now can apply for unemployment. I have no idea where we will end up or when it will happen. but things seem infinitely better without having to work for that company. now we start the routine of shedding the old unwanted objects from our life, no i'm not talking about retired parents, I'm talking about the things you thought would look great in your new place, or items that were just too good of a deal to pass up. the perfect effigy i can present is our hideous orange chair.

ONLY 6 DOLLARS!

I use the term effigy because some things should just be burned. or what about all that wood that you were totally going to use for this project you thought of.

Hunny, thats good wood, you don't just throw away good wood.

*sigh if only we knew then that we were going to have to move all this someday, perhaps we would have chosen an apartment with a larger dumpster. so the struggle continues, to pack up all that we wish to keep and find creative ways to dispose of the rest. *Craigslist enters stage right*

end scene 1

It can't really be as bad as it is...

For those of you who know me, you will not be surprised that I've seen Dune a number of times. And in that film there is a scene where they compress a soldiers body with a heavy stone until every drop of liquid has been extracted. they do this, because they live on a desert planet and greatly need the water. lately i've sort of felt like that soldier. alot of things have been weighing on my mind lately. you see, we were expecting to get these great jobs at the nuclear power plant, they would have paid off nearly all of our student loans and we could choose nearly anywhere to work. perhaps phoenix, to keep with the desert theme. however these jobs fell through, and now we are nearing the end of our lease. most of the cheap apartments around our area have been snatched up by people who were lucky enough to get the nuke plant jobs. (nearly 350 in number) and so everywhere we look is overpriced or has camouflaged wallpaper. (not a joke) is missing part of the ceiling and looks like it is still a working meth lab. but luckily i still have my job! or do i? I've been bounced around between two stores for the last 3 months. in the past 35 days i have had 7 days off and have worked 11 days in a row, twice! my shift last night was filled and i was sent home with no prior notice. and today my shift was cut in half with only an hour notice. I am a full time assistant manager and supposedly they are required to give me 38 hours a week. I am now below 28.  I am continually belittled by my boss in front of other employees and customers and his superior has told me to "deal." I have never been disliked by my coworkers and certainly never hated. here i am both. I honestly cannot think of a single thing i have ever done to these people that would warrant even a harsh look. I have worked off the clock, ran errands on my own time and even used my truck to move a trailer for them not because i was asked to, but because i was told to. I have been written up three times for things i never did and that they have no proof of. in one of the instances i wasn't even in the same state at the time. I keep thinking to myself that it can't be as bad as it is... but it is. I can't quit because without this job we can't even afford our rent and they won't fire me, so i can't collect unemployment. I have applied to every job i can think of or heard of within 20 miles. past that there is nothing until you hit green bay or sheboygan, which is nearly 40 minutes away.

and maybe thats what we need to do is move somewhere else. but i don't know where. and i don't know how.

I have given all that i can and all that i will. please crush something else.